Destiny is a success, millions play it across generations. But it’s also seen as a time sink. How can one balance Destiny and family while coping with not being the youngest anymore? One of our readers has written a pleasant column on exactly these topics.
I like Destiny. I’ve been playing it almost since the release (can you actually look up the exact launch date somewhere?) sometime in September or October. First on the PS3, then on the PS4. During this time, I’ve accumulated a staggering playtime (manually counted) of ten days, twelve hours, and 15 minutes (10D12H15M), which is about 250 hours. With three Guardians.
This – in Destiny’s average – quite meager playtime has a very simple reason: I am an after-work Guardian with a family. Every single hour on the Tower, in the spaceship, and of course on my favorite playgrounds Earth, Moon, Venus, Mars, and Reef is hard-won and somehow squeezed in.
When the wife becomes Omnigul … it’s Destiny time
Now, our beloved game is not exactly kid-friendly. Sure, killing aliens is important and someone has to do it. But try explaining to a four-year-old why dad is shooting a wild alien with a rocket launcher (no, I obviously don’t have that thing whose name you shouldn’t pronounce!). So what’s left? You play in the evening when the kids are in bed and the beloved wife has rolled her eyes and made her escape. The look is almost the same as that of Omnigul. Fortunately, she doesn’t scream like that…
Well, hoping she’ll calm down eventually, I eagerly press my PS button and enjoy the bluish glow of the PS4 coming to life. After the obligatory detour to the Tower or Reef, it’s time for (yet again) some loot runs. I really should level up all my Exo weapons and armor at some point. Red Death can’t heal yet, with the Night Hawk helmet “big game” isn’t leveled yet and so it goes on.
Was the jumping thing always like this, or …?
Slowly, the friends list fills up, and we actually manage to scrape together six people for Atheon. Everything goes smoothly until the Exo chest. Then it’s time to jump up walls again. And I mess it up as always. Hop-hop – hop-hop! I feel like Flip. For the young Guardians among us: That’s the grasshopper from Maya the Bee – that kids’ show back in the day. Drawn properly, not like the computer-animated stuff today.
But I’m digressing. Five guys are waiting at the Exo chest, and what does the old Warlock do? Exactly. Hop-hop! But my clanmates have mercy. At least those who aren’t rolling on the floor laughing and laying in their living rooms gasping for air. One even filmed my “efforts” with his phone and posted it in the Clan WhatsApp group…
But: They come back two at a time and explain the way to me (which I actually already know, but I’m just too dumb to jump properly again). “Look, grandpa, now you jump here (shooting with the Fatebringer – no, I don’t have it!). Very good. And now there! (shot!).” Phew, made it. Finally at the Exo chest. And while the mate pulls out the Silly Horn, dad gets – shards. Well, that half hour of hopping was worth it.
At the Templar, there’s only junk, and with Atheon, we have too many N00bs, and those who have already cleared the raid can’t help us out of the predicament anymore. So, let’s call it a day. Still a lovely evening. Especially for the others. Hop-hop. What a laugh we had…
When the little one needs to go to the bathroom during Atheon, dad suddenly becomes useful
Another example of a successful Destiny evening: Well, actually it’s already night. Just after half past two or so. With two young guys from the clan (young enthusiastic types), I venture into the 34 Prison for the first time. “That’s no problem. We’ll get you through in no time.” I do my best. And I do what I do best: die! Slowly, the two realize that it’s a problem when you spend more time reviving than killing enemies.
But help is on the way. And in the shape of my four-year-old. “Dad, I need to go to the bathroom!” While I’m still thinking, “well, then go!”, I quickly say goodbye and tend to the little one. By the time he’s back in bed and I’m sitting on the sofa, I just have time to hop to the treasure chest before time runs out.
In the party, I only hear strange, rattling noises. And gasping. “The final boss was never this easy,” I can barely hear amidst many, many fits of laughter. The solution to the riddle? “We just shoved you to the middle, and all the ads just blasted at you. Then we revived you every once in a while, and that was it!” There you can see how useful I can be when I just do what I can. Dying in style…
A golden evening in Destiny
But there are also beautiful moments. Like the one when you are really there for the first time when Atheon is brought down (alright, months later than the rest, but who cares?) and don’t even stand out too negatively. And when you’re rewarded for it: The Fatebringer at the Templar, Vision of Confluence and Vex Mythoclast from Atheon, all in one go. Now I just need Etheric Light without end to bring all the weapons up to 365. But I am now experienced in that. Nobody dies more beautifully or usefully than I in the 34.
And then come the moments of frustration again when our beloved game lags or when you struggle through various strikes, nightfalls, and similar events and then get kicked from the game right at around half past two at night due to a forced disconnection. Well, time to go to bed.
Three hours of sleep are enough. I just don’t know what for. I am tired – and I feel as old as I probably am now. Time to face reality? Oh come on, forget it! Tomorrow it continues. After all, even I can learn. And since the new TV with properly adjusted brightness works now, I can hit the hole in the Exo chest too.
This amusing guest post is from our reader Bernd Mutschler. And no, it doesn’t look like he has gotten the you-know-what.
