Baldur’s Gate 3: Astarion Romance Guide – how to easily win his heart

Astarion is one of the most coveted romance partners in Baldur’s Gate 3. Winning him over is not as easy as it seems. To make it easier for you, we have here a guide from Act 1 to Act 3, along with general tips.

Baldur’s Gate 3 allows you to not only meet your NPC companions, the Companions, but also to romance them skillfully. One of the most desired objects of desire, if not the most popular potential partner, is the vampire Astarion.

Astarion is one of the first characters to show interest in your character. However, he is not the easiest romantic partner in the game. To ensure you can win him over in your next run or if you just need help for a landing in the later acts, we have compiled everything here that can help you.

You meet him already in Act 1 near the crashed Nautiloid. In our overview, we explain where you can find and recruit all companions in Baldur’s Gate 3.

Unfortunately, it is impossible to go without spoilers – you have been warned. We have, however, refrained from providing specific dialogue options and recommend saving at the beginning of an interaction with him. We have also incorporated a large part of our own experience here. Most of what you read here has worked for us as well.

If you are looking for information on romance with another character, you can check our comprehensive guide:

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Baldur’s Gate 3: Romance Guide for all Companions – How to charm your Companions 

von Christos Tsogos

Astarion Romance Guide – general tips for more approval

Right from the start: Astarion’s approval increases when you engage in selfish acts. However, it is not true that you can romance him better as a evil character. Therefore, here are a few fundamental tips for your interactions.

First of all: You must start the romance in Act 1. Jumping in later is unfortunately not possible. Here, but having medium approval with him is sufficient.

Astarion’s character in brief

Astarion’s story revolves heavily around coercion and autonomy. He pretends to be an unattainable, cold-blooded vampire who is not interested in the fate of the world around him.

In reality, he has gone through 200 years of cruel slavery. He fears losing his newfound autonomy. This leads him to want to manipulate your character with sex. When he finally trusts you, he will reveal his wounded soul and ask for help. However, it takes him a while to feel secure enough with you.

How do I increase Astarion’s approval? If you want to raise Astarion’s esteem, especially at the beginning, make rather selfish decisions. He does not like it when you help other people – apparently. In reality, it is primarily about the fact that he thinks people already have enough of their own problems. Why should anyone also solve the problems of others?

He will not appreciate it if you offer help to everyone and their mother, especially in Act 1. Kagha and the refugees are at the top of his They should take care of their own business list.

We have the right answers for you here if you want to be completely sure.

These are Astarion’s answers

1. Astarion is happiest when he is elbow-deep in blood.
2. Astarion has a deep craving for revenge.
3. Astarion’s greatest fear is breaking a nail.

Cazador: In Act 3, you will go through the grand finale of Astarion’s personal quest. The level of approval from you and your personal preferences are very important here: You can choose whether to have Astarion take Cazador’s place and become a soulless vampire lord, or to stop the ritual and have him remain a vampire spawn.

If Astarion takes Cazador’s place, his behavior becomes more arrogant. Sunlight also doesn’t bother him after the epilogue. However, whether he still really loves you or can love at all without a soul is questionable. Vampire lord Astarion also talks about wanting to bite you and have you by his side forever. The dynamics of the relationship change noticeably.

If you want to prevent Astarion from taking Cazador’s place, you need to succeed in a DC-18 charisma check. If your relationship is good enough, you can simplify the charisma check to 15 with a DC-20 wisdom check. If this is successful, Astarion retains his soul and is also sensitive to sunlight after losing the illithid parasite. But he remains himself, and you can even visit his grave together.

In general: If Astarion asks for help after the battle against Cazador, never directly refuse him. This will cause him to do what he wants and then permanently leave your group. Regardless of whether you are in a relationship with him or not. Always keep Astarion in the group for these quests. Without him, the quest is easier, but he will hold it against you.

If you do not actively choose to end things with Astarion via dialogue, the vampire should be completely infatuated with your character. However, bugs may creep into your playthrough or you may have missed a scene. If this happens, you will unfortunately have to reload.

Have you already romanced Astarion? Or is there another companion who has caught your fancy? MyMMO editor Sophia has fallen for none other than the wizard Gale:
To date the biggest clown of Baldur’s Gate 3, I rejected two of the hottest companions

When he approaches you in dialogues, you should not refuse him either. That would hurt his ego and drop his approval for you significantly. Loyalty is important to him.

Especially when he shows you his more vulnerable side, you benefit when you engage with him and support him. His past is filled with abuse and coercion. Astarion seeks someone he can trust. Preferably someone with a slightly dark sense of humor and a focus on their own interests. But not necessarily someone cruel or evil.

Warning: For the romance, Astarion should ideally always be in your party. And if you have already maxed out the approval, the notifications that Astarion approves of you will disappear.

Act 1: How to pique Astarion’s curiosity from the start

As mentioned in the general tips, you need to increase his opinion of you in Act 1. The romance can begin with medium approval, but it’s better to be safe. Apply the basic tips from the general section above.

Here are some situations in which you can surely increase his approval:

• Let him bite you and accept his nature as a vampire. However, don’t let it go so far that he accidentally kills you. Also, defend him against the other camp members and assure him of your trust.
• Allow him to eat bandits.
• Let him open the barn door in the destroyed village.
• Give him the book of necromancy from Thay.
• When you talk to him about Cazador, respond that you will help him if he helps you.
• When it comes to how you would want to die, choose the knife or poison.
• Let yourself (successfully) be whipped by the priest of Loviatar.

The monster hunter Gandrel: As you explore the area of Act 1, you will eventually find yourself in a swamp area. Here lives a hag. On your way to her house, you meet the monster hunter Gandrel. He is looking for Astarion. Choose the dialogue options that lead to Astarion killing Gandrel.

The first intimate offer: Depending on your approval level, Astarion may offer you a hot night at the Tiefling party or even before that. Definitely accept the offer and let him bite you during sex.

Warning: If you did not have sex with Astarion in Act 1, you can continue his personal quest but cannot romance him anymore.

If he throws nasty comments at you at the end party in Act 1, that’s your sign that something has gone wrong. Specifically, you should reload if he responds to your question about what would be adequate entertainment for him with the following line: I’m talking about sex, darling. Not with you, of course! Can you imagine?

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Act 2: How to navigate the (romantic) shadow lands

Also in Act 2, your bread and butter is to increase Astarion’s approval for you. Don’t forget to continue letting him drink your blood. Here are some more general situations in which you can please him:

• Tell Jaheira in the inn of Last Light that you are on vacation.
• Ask the Cat His Majesty if you can observe him up close and do so.
• Do not drink Jaheira’s wine with truth serum.
• Talk to the strange ox and promise to keep his secret for you.
• Win the hide-and-seek game with Oliver.

In Act 2, Astarion will also invite you for a second hot night, although you will not experience this as a cutscene. The focus in this story section is much more on helping Astarion with his personal quest and encouraging him in his pursuit of autonomy.

Be understanding when he reveals his trauma to you. Don’t hold it against him if he doesn’t want to sleep with you a third time. Give him his space, but help him with supportive words and actions whenever he asks for it.

The scars on his back: Early in Act 2, you will encounter Astarion as he tries to see his back in the mirror. Help him by drawing the scars in the sand. Later, he will come up with the idea to ask the devil Raphael for help. Tell him that this is a good idea.

The deal with Raphael: You will meet the aforementioned devil in the inn of Last Light. There he is playing a D&D version of chess with the young tiefling Mol – if Mol is still alive. Make sure Astarion is with you so that Raphael can offer you a first deal: You do something for him and he tells you everything he knows about the scars.

By the time you get close to the mausoleum and the temple of Shar, the devil will offer you the deal again in detail. You are to kill the Orthon Yurgir, who is trapped in the temple. This is a difficult battle, but you can also incite Yurgir and his allies to simply take themselves out. Astarion will first disapprove of this, but will then think it is very good.

Have Raphael give you all the information afterward. If your approval is high enough, Astarion will want to speak with you during the next long rest and confess his feelings to you.

In the towers of Moonrise: Here you encounter a dark elf in one of the side rooms. She wishes for nothing more than to be bitten by a vampire one day and even offers you a powerful potion for it. Astarion will not want this. Encourage him, support him. Make it clear that he is not your slave and can decide for himself. Unfortunately, you will have to forfeit the potion.

This interaction can also trigger Astarion’s confession to you – provided you have not forced him into anything.

Warning: If Astarion does not confess his feelings to you by the end of Act 2, you cannot continue the romance in Act 3. It is ideal if you talk to him before the big decision in Act 2.

Act 3: How to safely bring your romance to the baldurian harbor

If you have accepted Astarion’s confession, you should start Act 3 in a committed relationship with him. Here, it is especially important to support him in his quest for revenge against Cazador. But of course, you should still keep an eye on his approval. Now he actually appreciates it when you do good.

• Interact with Yenna – as long as you do not invite her directly to the camp, Astarion will appreciate it.
• Talk to Ulma in the Gur camp in Rivington. Tell her that her children are probably already dead.
• Bark at Mar’hyah twice.
• Continue to tell the strange ox that you will keep his secret.
• Boo the clown.
• When you go to the stage for the clown, say that you are special because you are always kind.
• Resolve the murders in the temple.
• Agree to watch Gortash’s coronation.
• Rescue Florrick from prison.
• Tell Astarion that you would never force him to have an orgy with the dark elf twins if he expresses his discomfort about it.
• Do not take off your clothes and do not sleep with Haarlep.

Zethino, Master of Love: In the Circus of Last Days in Rivington, you can test your love. The dryad Zethino asks you to bring one of your companions with you. Of course, you take Astarion with you.

We have the right answers for you here if you want to be completely sure.

These are Astarion’s answers

1. Astarion is happiest when he is elbow-deep in blood.
2. Astarion has a deep craving for revenge.
3. Astarion’s greatest fear is breaking a nail.

Cazador: In Act 3, you will go through the grand finale of Astarion’s personal quest. The level of approval from you and your personal preferences are very important here: You can choose whether to have Astarion take Cazador’s place and become a soulless vampire lord, or to stop the ritual and have him remain a vampire spawn.

If Astarion takes Cazador’s place, his behavior becomes more arrogant. Sunlight also doesn’t bother him after the epilogue. However, whether he still really loves you or can love at all without a soul is questionable. Vampire lord Astarion also talks about wanting to bite you and have you by his side forever. The dynamics of the relationship change noticeably.

If you want to prevent Astarion from taking Cazador’s place, you need to succeed in a DC-18 charisma check. If your relationship is good enough, you can simplify the charisma check to 15 with a DC-20 wisdom check. If this is successful, Astarion retains his soul and is also sensitive to sunlight after losing the illithid parasite. But he remains himself, and you can even visit his grave together.

In general: If Astarion asks for help after the battle against Cazador, never directly refuse him. This will cause him to do what he wants and then permanently leave your group. Regardless of whether you are in a relationship with him or not. Always keep Astarion in the group for these quests. Without him, the quest is easier, but he will hold it against you.

If you do not actively choose to end things with Astarion via dialogue, the vampire should be completely infatuated with your character. However, bugs may creep into your playthrough or you may have missed a scene. If this happens, you will unfortunately have to reload.

Have you already romanced Astarion? Or is there another companion who has caught your fancy? MyMMO editor Sophia has fallen for none other than the wizard Gale:
To date the biggest clown of Baldur’s Gate 3, I rejected two of the hottest companions