A Dungeon Master decided to run a one-shot for her family in Dungeons & Dragons, but she didn’t expect who would turn out to be the most vicious member of the adventure party.
What did the Dungeon Master report? DM AnotherName545 shared with the D&D community on Reddit her latest revelation that she encountered during a session with her family.
She planned a one-shot (a short campaign that ends after one session) for her family, including her husband, children, and her mother, the grandmother of the family. For this, she used the adventure “A Perilous Joy Festival,” which is available for free on D&D Beyond.
The Dungeon Master writes that her grandmother emphasized during the introduction of her character that she did not want to fight. Therefore, she chose a halfling bard who focused more on healing spells.
When the adventure started, the woman’s excitement was limited, as AnotherName545 admits, but that changed when they got involved in their first fight. For there, the true nature of the presumed “pacifist” was revealed.
Grandma doesn’t play games, knows exactly what to do
How did Grandma act in the fight? When one of the enemies was defeated, lying on the ground and dying, it was finally the bard’s turn. Instead of healing or inspiring her companions, Grandma simply asked, to her daughter’s surprise, if she could crush the victim’s head.
The Dungeon Master didn’t want to deprive her mother of this macabre enjoyment, so the little halfling bard was allowed to stomp the enemy’s skull. Afterwards, Grandma was finally able to fully engage in the game, as AnotherName545 reports.
“It was especially funny because she is a retired nurse and carried out her attacks very clinically, specifying exactly which artery she was severing,” she adds as a vivid explanation.
How does the community react to the murderous lady? Based on the reactions of the community on Reddit, the murderous grandma of the family is not an isolated case. Apparently, there are many ladies who, at an advanced age, are not willing to curb their imagination, no matter how brutal it may sound:
“No one is as merciless as little old ladies,” explains GrandBet4177, “I have lost more rounds of ‘Cards Against Humanity’ against grandmothers than any other age group.”
This is also confirmed by swedeonabike: “I work in a nursing home and sometimes play a simplified non-fantasy version of DnD with our residents. ‘I want to stab his eyes out with my knitting needles’ is a sentence I didn’t expect to hear until a certain game.”
Nevertheless, Grandma’s halfling bard left a lasting impression, which can be summarized as follows by M4LK0V1CH: “Grandma doesn’t want to fight… she wants to kill…”
The Dungeon Master’s grandmother is not the first elderly lady to bring joy to the community on Reddit. Another player previously reported that her grandmother had been an enthusiastic D&D player in her early 80s and now passed her entire collection to her granddaughter: A Grandma finds her old figures and books of Dungeons & Dragons, gives them to her granddaughter, who makes the community envious
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