Conan Exiles recently received new emotes via a patch. Among them are “funny” dance animations. However, they go completely off the rails when no pants are worn and the notorious penis physics and other animation glitches take over …
Warning! Not Safe for Work!
Conan Exiles is known for many things: brutal survival action in the wasteland, wild animals, savage barbarians, creepy horrors lurking in the sewers of ancient ruins and joyfully swinging penises!
The masculinity is therefore again at the center of the latest update for Conan Exiles, which brought 50 fresh emotes.
Conan Exiles – Emotes – Dance the traditional Cossack Dance!
Those who unlock the new dance animations and let a clothed barbarian perform the emote are treated to a classic folk dance that strongly resembles the traditional Cossack dance of the Cossacks. The dance is well animated and full of acrobatic elements.
However, if a proper barbarian regards pants as a nasty invention and constantly runs around Hyboria unclothed, he gets an entirely different dance performance when he performs “/emote dance”. As expected, the anatomy swings and sways – depending on length and size – physically correctly through the air during the wild dance.
Conan Exiles – Dance Emotes – “This cannot be healthy!”
This may disturb those less inclined towards penises, but the true horror of the “penis dance” is the completely buggy animations that only become apparent when no clothing is worn.
In light of the bizarre contortions and distortions, the penis quickly becomes a minor matter. Against these animation fails, even the pancake faces and monkey animations from Mass Effect Andromeda are harmless.
If you want to see the bizarre penis dances and contortions from Hyboria: We have embedded them here.
But beware! The following animations contain animated penises and are definitely “Not Safe for Work!”
Also interesting: Conan Exiles – Developer has big plans for the penis!
